The Authentic Motivator

One of my most treasured gifts is my ability to do my own hair. When I was a kid, my mom was the queen of styling it for me. I’d rock tiny braids decorated with barrettes or colorful beads at the ends. I felt like a Nubian princess—seriously, you couldn’t tell me anything! Maybe I got that feeling from watching Michael Jackson’s “Remember the Time” video, which made me feel like I was part of Egyptian culture. But in reality, since we couldn’t afford to go to a salon, my mom became my personal stylist. Even though getting my hair done wasn’t exactly comfortable, I loved how it made me look and feel. As they say, “It hurts to look pretty,” and I didn’t mind the pain if it meant ending up with a beautiful hairstyle.

I also remember a special moment with my older cousin, Rhonda. She was always so stylish—her hairstyles and fashion sense were impeccable, and to me, she was a queen. Every 90s fashion trend she rocked was flawless. One day, she decided to braid my hair and even added a weave. I can’t quite recall my exact age, but it feels like it was yesterday—those confidence-filled “you could not tell me anything” moments. I was captivated by hairstyles because, looking back, I realize they carried so much beauty and power for Black women. This isn’t just about style; it’s about identity, self-expression, and sometimes even a path to freedom. That’s a story for another day, but just know, it resonates deeply.

Before I hit my teenage years, I started practicing braids on my Barbie dolls. I’d begin with her hair, but very soon, my fingers were running the show, fiddling with tiny strands. Before long, I was braiding all my Barbies’ hair, each with a different expression. Looking back, that was the start of my journey into using hair as a form of creative art and personal expression.

“Hair is the crown of women, and its beauty is a reflection of cultural identity and personal expression.” – Indira Ganesan

Then came a pretty challenging chapter—my sixth-grade year—when my mom fell seriously ill and was hospitalized for a while. When she finally came home, she was bedridden for months. During that time, it was just me, my dad, and my two brothers. My dad did his best to style my hair, but, well… let’s just say it was quite the adventure! That experience taught me how to do my own hair and became a lesson in independence. What began as a necessity soon blossomed into an art form. Hair transformed from a routine task into my canvas, a reflection of who I was.

As an adult, I find joy in switching up my hairstyles to match my mood or the moment. I love exploring different styles—big box braids one day, natural curls the next, or a sleek single braid for a touch of elegance. And my wig collection? It’s like having a wardrobe of possibilities—playing dress-up every day!

Recently, I spent seven days at the beach, which was the perfect excuse to get creative. Between work and routine life, it’s easy to forget the fun of experimenting with your look. Plus, I’m not in the fashion or entertainment industry, so keeping things modest in corporate America is my daily style. But honestly, sometimes it gets boring. So, I took the opportunity to switch up my hairstyles, did a little mini photoshoot, and by the way, I love taking pictures!

Watching the hotel staff look at me in confusion when I changed my hair was pretty funny. From afar, I think they thought my husband had brought along three different women and was just switching things up—who knows? That’s probably just my imagination. By the end of the trip, a kind lady approached me and said, “Wow, you changed your hair almost every day. So cool!”

That comment made me realize something important: I’m grateful my mom never took me to a salon. It forced me to get creative, experiment, and develop my own style. Because of that, I can confidently and creatively match my look to any mood or occasion, whether I’m at work, on vacation, or just having fun. Any time, any day.

And honestly, let’s not forget the savings that come with doing it myself!

“I’ve learned that sometimes it’s the way we wear our hair that makes the strongest statement of who we are.” – Michelle Obama